Its not over yet
by melcreates
Summary: Story about Sam and Freddie's friendship and how it was changed by Carly. Its something that came to me months ago and the characters develop as the story goes on. Promise it must not be that lame, cause I wrote it and... MY MUM THINKS IM AWESOME!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note: Hey firs ever Fanfic please don't hate me or it. just a flash back start up chapter I would love to hear any tips btw. :) please enjoy.**

 **I adore icarly but I certainly do not own it. my bae Dan does ( p.s sorry I just said bae)**

FREDDIE POV

This is the worst day of my whole life. How could this have happened. One day everything's normal your sitting laughing with both your dad making jokes you don't understand and telling you how proud he is of you, and the next your at in your room when your mum runs in crying and telling you the devastating words. That you know you'll never forget. But here I am trying not to cry as you watch your fathers coffin being lowered into the ground. He was shot, i didn't much understand that but i knew daddy wasn't coming back and it was because someone didn't want him around any more. He was the most amazing man in the world to me, but apparently not everyone shared that opinion. I couldn't believe this was happening, even if i took my whole life i wouldn't let who killed my dad get away with it! Id find them and kill them!

But for now i couldn't do anything I'm a mere 5 year old and as much as my mother tells me I'm a big boy I knew I didn't yet have the power to do anything. So for now ill just cry and miss my daddy. I walked away from my family to the stream running trough the grave yard, and sat down leaning against a tree. I started crying. Nothing could change how i was feeling, NOTHING!-"urggh"- someone shouted. I looked up to see a girl with blood curls and blue eyes who seemed around my age. She noticed me, and said "what" in a rather aggressive town, at fist she scared me. Then she dropped to her knees and began crying.

"Hey... You okay?" i asked whilst wiping back tears.

"um...no...you?" she replied.

"no..." i answered. I stared at her for a while her head was bowed and i could hear here whimpering. I sat next to her not knowing how to help, and wondering why i felt the need to. There was just something about this girl she was important. Somehow.

"umm...my names Freddie" I said

"I'm Sam, I'm not having a very good day" she replied

"Yeah me ether" I said.

"why what's the matter?" she asked.

"umm... My daddy's gone away, and he's never coming back." I answered.

"My daddy's gone too he left me my sister and my mum, i hate him" she told me.

"Why" I said.

"Because he's left me, now I'm on my own. My sisters always with my aunt and my other family who love her way more than me, and my mums always drunk, and doesn't even care about me. She says that daddy leaving is all my fault!" Sam said then she burst into tears. I put my hand around her and immediately forgot about being sad. All I cared about was making sure she was okay and shed always be.

"don't worry, your not alone any more you've got me, i care about you. Its gunna be okay. I promise." I said. She looked up and smiled "really?" she asked

" yeah Sam, I'll always be here for you, i promise." it was i promise but i knew i would always live by it. She was special i just knew she was.

"I hope so." Sam smiled. Maybe this isn't that bad a day.

NORMAL POV

And he was so right. Sam and Freddie became best friend they spent everyday together soon they started the same elementary school. They were really close they told each other everything. They went through everything together. They felt each others pain and helped each other get through it. Their mums became really close too they both lost their husbands, i different ways but still. Freddie's mother Marissa helped Pam when she was struggling with alcoholism and drug addictions.

Sam and Freddie both managed to have a nice child hood even with the trauma they faced. They went through some struggles like Sam going through her sister leaving and a unpleasant visit from her dad. She did mange to get into some trouble resulting in juvi. But managed to get back on her feet with Freddie's help. But they stayed together trough thick and thin not making many other friends, well at least non to replace the other. And that it all stayed that way at least until middle school. Until she came along. She changed everything. Their whole friendship.

Her name. CARLY.

 **AN: hope you like it!**

 **btw if anyone out there is from America please pm me I have some quarries about American school. :)**

 **Anyway, peace to the pigeon lovers, and the seddie followers. Good day to you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey second chapter! hope you lie it, thanks for reviews.**

 **disclaimer: don't own icarly!**

SAMS POV

Wow we're finally here the very first day of middle school. I cant lie I'm kind of nervous. I'm hanging on to Freddie by the arm as he drags me around our new school Ridgeway. He keeps trying to tell me there's nothing to worry about but I cant help it. I've never really been any good at making friends. If it weren't for Freddie I'd have non. We found our lockers and he says he'll see me at lunch. How am I gunna get though the next four periods!

...

Its finally lunch, man i really hate school. I mean not only are all the people really ANNOYING but the lessons are sooo boring! I've had to stop myself from putting most of them in hospital, i wouldn't be but i made a promise to Freddie that i wouldn't get into much trouble, at least not enough to get sent back to juvi. Plus its my first day at school I don't think it would be such a good idea to get thrown out within the first 24 hours.

I took extra helpings of the fries and made my way to find Freddie. After a while of searching i eventually came across him in a seat next to this girl with sweet brown hair and nice facial features. Within those seconds my face turned to anger staring at her giggle and Freddie look completely mesmerised by her. I walked over to them filled with rage.

"oh hey Sam, this is Carly, we just met." Freddie said looking completely terrified by Sam's facial features.

"hey" said Cary with a scared look.

I was mad not even sure why maybe because i felt like this girl was taking my best friend. Or maybe because when i saw him look at her it mad my heart want to tear in half. I wasn't sure if i even liked Freddie like that, but i was sure i didn't need anyone taking that chance from me. i took an instant dislike to this girl i couldn't bare her i wanted to tip her lunch down her. I was about to scream at her to get lost when from out of nowhere i said -

"Hey is this dork bothering you i can get rid of him if you want?"

i don't no where it came from i meant the complete opposite of what i said. For some reason because i felt so threated by this girl i had lashed out and tried to disguise feelings for Freddie that hadn't even been established yet.

Then without a second thought i took my tray and tipped it down Freddie. The whole cafeteria shared a look of pure shook but it was the look i got from Freddie of pure confusion and hurt that effected me the most. I wanted to help him and tell him how sorry i was and how i didn't know what came over me but i just couldn't.

Carly helped him and me and Freddie didn't talk for the rest of the day. I was so mad at him even though he had done nothing wrong. Carly had come to talk to me wondering why i was so upset, she was so sweet, just like Freddie. Maybe they re perfect for each other. I really hate her.

"I know you and him are really good friends." she said with looks of pity in her eyes. It was amazing how much you could resent someone who had done nothing wrong. She couldn't help being perfect. She could try. But she couldn't help it.

" I'm sure he'll get over it, he's kind of a dork, i wouldn't want to hang out with him much if i was you." i said to her with a cold tone.

" He seems sweet, plus i don't have that many friends at the moment." replied Carly.

"really a nice girl like you?" i said coming of rather mean. Get your own best friends girl.

"well maybe we could hang out, after school?" she asked rather existed.

I wasn't sure how to responded i mean the girl had done nothing wrong, and i kind of did need to make friends. But I mean she seemed a bit prissy. Then again my best friends Freddie and he's like the dorkiest kid ever. Speaking of which how am i suppose to be friends with this girl if I'm still figuring out my feelings for Freddie. If she stays around he'll probably fall head over heels for her and that will be it for me and him. Oh im confused.

"Okay" i said.

 **hey thanks for reading. Peace to the pigeon lovers, seddie followers! Good day to you!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello humans that can read, this is chapter number three any comments or complaints I'd love to hear and if you just want to chat I love making friends too! I'm actually enduring some troubles at the moment with a boy I recently broke up with. so if you want to give advice please do, I need any I can get!**

 **Disclaimer I don't own icarly!**

FREDDIE POV

I'm now in my 4th year at ridgeway. 14 i know right. Sam, Carly and I started a web show last year we called it icarly and amazingly now its one of the most popular thins on the internet. Its amazing! Sam , Carly and I are still friends. Well me and Sam still hang out. But i guess you wouldn't call us friends. I don't really understand what happened but for some reason since our first day at ridgeway she's practically loathed me. I don't no what I did wrong. I've tried to ask her and be her friend again, but every time I try to talk to her she just gets more angry. Its so strange, I've tried acting cool about it and saying I didn't like her back. When in truth I never stopped liking her or caring about her. To be honest in the past few years i think my feelings for her have kind of deepened.

Every time she smiles my heart literally skips a beat, when she says my name (which she rarely does) my mind spins and i cant make out words. I'm sometimes kept up all night just thinking about her golden curled hair or her icy blue eyes. I don't know where these feelings came from, they just hit me one day and i couldn't get rid of them ( much like Sam did.) But its so hard living with these emotions when every day I'm granted with constant reminders that Sam doesn't like me in that way, or at all, in fact it wouldn't be a stretch to say she hates me. I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!

Which does make it impossible to get anything done. When I look at other girls they mean nothing to me, in fact just trying to picture any one else as my girlfriend makes me wheezy and my stomach hurt.

Every time Sam and I re alone i wonder if it would be best if i just came out and told her how i feel. But she always ends up making me chicken out by saying i was boring or a dork. I have largely contemplated talking to Carly about my feelings but she'll probably just end up telling me to talk to Sam or talking to her herself.

The three of us plus Spencer (Carly's brother) and my mum just got back from japan we went because icarly was nominated for an iweb award which btw we won! It was a fun journey, well i don't know about fun but, memorable.

Carly said for me to meet her and Sam at the groovy smoothie in 15 minuets so i think I'll head down now. When i got there I saw where Sam and Carly were seated and made my way to a seat at there table. When i sat down i caught a glimpse of Sam looking at me. I looked at Carly and asked her how she was doing, trying to distract myself from thinking about Sam. Which did not work! Carly went babbling on about umm... Something and I couldn't seem to attract my attention away from the sad expiration I noticed Sam making. I was dying to know what the matter with her but i really wasn't prepared to ask with Carly there. For some unknown reason i was convinced that Sam was more likely to be honest with me if Carly wasn't there observing.

A few minuets later Carly said she need to go to the bathroom leaving Sam and me on our own. I decided after arguing with myself that it couldn't do any harm at least asking if she was doing okay. I took a deep breath and looked at her.

"Sam umm.. Are you feeling alright" i asked cautiously. She looked at me with sort of a curious expiration her face and said...

"Yeah sure, why?" rather bluntly.

" I don't know you just seemed quite upset, are you sure there's nothing you want to tell me about?" i asked trying to make her feel as if she can trust me. Which she honestly can.

"Even if I was upset, which I said I wasn't! What would make me want to tell you?!" Well that made me sink straight back into my seat. I guess i could keep trying. One of these days she'll come around. She'll want to be my friend again, just like old times. One day soon, hopefully...

"I don't no sorry i said anything, I was just trying to help" I told her.

"Well I clearly don't need any help, and you dork would be the last person I'd come to if I ever did"

With that I think its time to leave and maybe think about how I make life decisions...

 **hopefully this will become a lot more interesting soon, btw I think I will add a Sam and Freddie scene into the episode after when this is set who ever says the episode first I will mention!**

 **Peace to the pigeon lovers and Seddie followers. Good day to you!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey, a lot about to go down in this chapter, I know its early but I read a review someone posted who does not have an account, and I got really existed and finished this! hope you like it! BTW would just like to point out that in this story Freddie showed no real feelings for Carly in that way. Apart from that this is very similar to the real icarly.**

 **Disclaimer: Do not own icarly! #justsayin**

SAMS POV

After what I had said to Freddie at the groovy smoothie ha had made the choice to go home. Which was fair enough what I said to him was horrible. He was just trying to help . But I couldn't help it how I treated Freddie. I kept pushing him away. Even though he didn't seem to want to date Carly I still don't think he'd be any good with me. He deserved someone better. Prettier. Not me. He was so kind and caring, and I was the complete opposite I cared about him to much to let him go through being with me. Not that I knew for certain he wanted to be . Yeah that was probably just something crazy my mind came up with.

I would never tell him how I felt, not just because i would hate the feeling of being rejected by him. Also because i was even more freighted that he would say yes. Want to date me. I know he really does love me as a friend he's proven that enough times. But he might make the mistake of thinking that, that love was the same as, you know 'like liking' me. If he did get them miked up he'd probably realise within the first month of the relationship. You know, that I'm still Sam and just as horrible as ever. Then he'd inevitably dump me and I'd be in an even worse place than i am now. That's why things will stay as they are. Stay me keeping Freddie far enough away from me so he doesn't end up getting hurt.

Soon Carly and I went back up to her apartment and hung out for a bit. Eventually we both got tired and I said goodnight, the headed home. I walked out of her apartment. As I did me head was full of thoughts of Freddie. Wondering if I was doing the right thing. Treating him in this way. I did often miss the old times. The old days of Freddie and I. I felt like I was losing him this way, losing my childhood friend. Whom I used to not be able to bare a day without. Things aren't the same as then though. Me treating him like this has of course caused our friendship to change a lot. But he's still around, I know I am still am blessed with the knowledge that if anything terrible ever did happen to me again sure enough he'd be there to make things better.

With all these thoughts going through my head at once it caused me to get distracted and not think what i was doing. I had tripped on the top stair of Carly and Freddie's apartment building. I twisted round and my whole body plummeted down the flight of stairs. I landed face first on the ground of the buildings lobby. My whole body ached a bit but I wasn't really that hurt.

It was already late and now I really didn't feel like walking all the way home, so decided I'd just lay there and sleep. Why not I was tired. And no matter about the soppy stuff i was still Sam. I still needed to sleep. So i did.

...

The next day after i went back up to Carly's apartment Freddie had come in and asked us if we thought he was funny. We both gave him an answer to say we didn't. Which was kind of a lie on my part. I know for a fact that when we were little i used to think Freddie was hilarious. He was the best at making me laugh when i was down, putting a smile back on my face.

FLASH BACK

NORMAL POV

Sam and Freddie were around 7 years old. Sam was sitting on a bench in the park crying. It was because earlier on her mum had gotten drunk and invited her new boyfriend over. He swore at Sam and got annoyed at her for not going to the shop to get them more alcohol. Even though she wouldn't be aloud. He started throwing empty beer glasses at her. Soon enough him and Sam's mum were making a game out of it. Eventually they past out and Sam ran out of her house crying.

She had been sitting there for about half an hour when Freddie found her.

"Hey I've been looking for you" Freddie told Sam.

"Just go away Freddie!" Sam shouted, hoping he would leave. But he just sat next to her.

"Sam, what's the matter?" Freddie asked her sending her a caring look. "you'll feel better if you tell me" he said, taking both of her hands away from her face.

"Please just leave me, you wouldn't understand!" Sam screamed. But Freddie just gave her another sympathetic look.

"Okay, maybe i don't, then you don't have to tell me. But i do have to cheer you up." Said Freddie who gave her a smile. She looked at him, secretly glad he was here. It made her calm down before she did something stupid like run away.

Freddie then started tickling her tummy, which took her by surprise and caused her to giggly uncontrollably.

"stop it. He...he...he. Stop it" she said trying to push his hands away and giving him a big smile. He then stopped only to get down on the ground and grasp his hands together.

"Please Sam, Please, stop crying!" he said in a strange voice while, making funny faces. Which caused Sam to giggle uncontrollably.

"Okay...he...he, I'll stop crying!" She said to him feeling 100% better than she had done, only a few moments ago.

" Promise? Or will i have to tickle you again? Cause i will." Joked Freddie.

"promise." Sam Agreed.

"Good, now lets go to my house and get ice cream" Freddie said whilst taking her hand and leading her out of the park.

END OF FLASHBACK

SAM POV

In the next few days Carly, Freddie, Spencer and I got caught up in trying to get some more amazing coconut cream pie. We had this plan to go to this dead pie makers funeral so Freddie could get his pie recipe from his computer.

When we got there Carly told me to go in the Back room to help Freddie find the recipe. It didn't take long for us to start arguing.

"Just give it to me I'll find it" i spat at Freddie whilst trying to take the keyboard out f his hands. To my surprise he let go almost straight away and i gave him a puzzled look.

"Sam why do you do that? Shout at me and treat me like I'm stupid. It doesn't have to be like that" Freddie said to me.

" Yes It does!" i shouted i reply.

" Why i don't get it? It never used to be?" He questioned me. I couldn't look him in the eye. I couldn't tell him the reason. He wouldn't understand. I couldn't look at him, i knew if i did I'd do something stupid.

"Sam look at me, it doesn't!" Freddie please stop it, i thought. "What did i do wrong to make you treat me the way you do! Please just tell me so i can make it better" Please stop it Freddie.

"stop it Freddie, you didn't do anything wrong!" I tried to explain.

"then why do you Treat me like this? Please just tell me Sam, so i can get my best friend back!" He wasn't making this easy on me i stopped looking at him. I couldn't take it.

"SAM LOOK AT ME! TELL ME PLEASE,PLEASE" I can't take it any longer. I grabbed his collar and pulled his lips to mine, he was shocked. I immediately regretted what i did and pulled back very sudden. Which then cause me to go back into the computer making it fall to the floor. With a bang! Which caused everyone to run into the room. They looked at me and Freddie curiously. I turned to look at Freddie. He looked confused, and his eyes stared into mine.

Oh no i think I've made a big mistake...

 **That's chapter 4 hope you like it would love to hear what you thought!**

 **peace to the pigeon lovers and Seddie followers. Good day to you!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey, okay sorry I haven't posted in a while, but you know...stuff and...stuff happened...fine I don't really have and excuse OKAY! you can hate me. But stuff did happen to other people... Miss Miranda Cosgrove turned 22 on the 14th! YAY! also Jennette Mccurdy was at the music billboard awards (Which I had to search after she said she'd be there..lol) speaking of whom her new show Between starts on Thursday which I am so very pumped for. But look at me I'm craving donuts whilst listening to Ed Sheeran 'bloodstream'. So onwards with the story...**

 **Disclaimer: Don't own icarly!**

FREDDIE POV

Yesterday after we all got back from Carly's apartment we watched TV for a bit but I left early. I stood outside mine and Carly's apartment waiting for Sam to come out. I was really confused about what had happened earlier. All I know is after I started questioning Sam she defiantly kissed me, and I stupidly left it to long to kiss her back and missed my opportunity! How can I have let this happen! I've been waiting years for something to happen between me and Sam. Now it finally has and I made a stupid mistake.

She just took me by surprise that's all. I mean I wasn't expecting her to just kiss me. Why did she kiss me? I don't know but I have to find out. Like if my life depends on it I have to. I waited for around 20 minuets before I started to hear sounds of Sam existing.

She slowly walked out of the apartment with a depressed look on her face. I think seeing me took her by surprise, she sent me a questioning look.

"Sam, we need to talk." i told her.

"Not right now Freddie okay, I really don't want to talk about it." Said Sam she started walking away so I grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Sam please, I don't want to loose you again, okay." I told her.

"You didn't loose me Freddie I'm still here. You don't understand, us not being as close is for your own good." she muttered, looking down. But I heard her, and it kind hurt.

" How can it be, I like you Sam and I care about you. Your my best friend!" I said looking at her seriously.

"I care about you too. But maybe too much in a different way..." Her voice trailed of.

" NO SAM. I like you I really do, and if you mean what I think then.. Then why can't we just be happy?" I asked.

" Because... because I know that if we ever did start dating you'd just regret it in the first few months and we'd both end up getting even more hurt than before!" She shouted.

"How can you say that when you haven't even given me a chance. I know I could never regret being with you, your Sam. My Sam!" I said trying to make my point clear. "Sam I do really like you."

"I can't do it now Freddie, okay? What happened at the funeral was a mistake. I know that." After she said that she scurried away. But I didn't try and stop her, she had said all she needed to. I knew in my head I wasn't about to give up on me and Sam. Even if I was only to get our friendship back, that would be enough.

I slowly waked into my apartment. My mum had already left for her nightshift. I went straight to my room. Then grabbed the first thing that came to my head, along with my CD radio. I sat down on the third step of my fire escape.

I listen to music all night, whilst I looked through an old photo album my mum had made when me and Sam were little. I noticed a picture from the park me and Sam always used to visit.

...

FLASHBACK

"Push me, push me!" Sam told me.

"I am" I replied. As i pushed Sam swing higher in the air.

"He...he, higher! Higher!" She ordered, whilst giggling.

"Okay, okay." I said. We played on the swing for a while, until Sam ran of to go on the slid. I was about to chase after her, when I was approached by another boy of my age with a sly grin on his face.

"Where do you think your going? DORK!" The boy yelled at me.

I pointed over to the slid, acting quite afraid of this boy. (Which I was) " just...umm, over there." I explained. "look its not nice to call people 'dorks' okay"

"Whatever! Your dorky face was just begging me to say it. Any way what else am I suppose to call you, 'freaky-freakster'!" The boy asked, then shoved me backwards. I feel down on the floor, and as he was about to push me again Sam came up behind him.

"What do you think your doing!?" she asked with a vicious tone. He turned to face her and replied-

"Oh nothing Blondie, just taking care of some stupid nerd." he said looking very pleased with himself.

"Yeah Ha, Ha-" Sam said sarcastically," look why don't you run as fast as you can, before i put you in you place!"

" Good one like I'd be scared of a girl!" he responded. Bad idea, within a second Sam flipped him straight onto the floor, then some how managed to tie his shoe lace round the climbing frame, so he'd just hang there. It was funny.

She then walked over to me and helped me to my feet. Every kid in the park was watching, but we didn't care. After that my mum took us home. Sam stayed there all night, we played and watched funny movies. It was the best...

...

NORMAL

Thinking back to that day made me more upset, it just reminded me how Sam and I aren't that close anymore, and may never be again. But I wasn't giving up yet. No not yet, not by a long shot. I would get my Sammy back, one way or another...

 **Back to me, so hope you didn't despise it, but even if you did at lest you could bare to read it... sooo that's something...um... REVIEW!**

 **Peace to the pigeon lovers and Seddie followers! Good day to you!**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Hey, long time no see...well not that long but you know. I really wasn't sure how this should go but I hope it's okay. If its not please make me aware...**

 **Disclaimer: Not the owner of the best show in the world. A.k.A , ICARLY!**

SAM POV

That hurt more than being shot in the head.

I've never been able to understand how Freddie has this power over me that I can't control. I've only ever experienced such powerless emotions with one other person . My dad . But in extremely different ways.

Freddie has this ability to make me feel like girl, like someone who could just crumble at his finger tips. He makes me feel special. Wanted. My farther on the other hand makes me feel pretty much the exact opposite. Unwanted, uncared for. Scared.

He made my life so miserable at such a young age to be honest the only time I ever really felt like a kid was after he left, and Freddie came into my life. Thank God for Freddie. He brought out the misery, the fear, without even trying. He cared about me, and that's all I really needed. Someone who cares.

Freddie had, and still has the ability to make my whole day better by just smiling. He granted me with joy by making me laugh and holding my hand. Wow you can understand what I mean when I say Freddie makes me feel like a girl.

The thing is sometimes I don't even mind. It doesn't matter when I'm with him. Well, it didn't. But now I've grown. Ever since I came out of juvi, and I met Carly things changed. I changed.

Seriously the more and more I think of that boy the more I wish I could take back the last few minuets of my life and talk to him. Tell him how I feel that I do need him back.

It really amazes me how right he can be about me. How he knows more about what I need than I do.

How can I have just walked away, I should have talked to him. Explained my self. I at least owe him that.

What am I talking about I owe that boy so much more. I owe him my life .

Quite literally...

FLASHBACK

"he...he...he!" Man I wish Melanie would stop laughing, she's irritating me.

"SHUT UP MEL, YOU'RE ANNOYING ME!" I shouted to get her to stop. " Freddie I want to do something else! Can't you tell us a story!?"

"Umm...okay, lets sit in bed." Said Freddie. Me, Mel and Freddie all sat down on my bed.

"So, once upon a time there was this girl-" He started.

"what was her name? Was she a princess?" asked Mel. I pushed her onto the floor.

Freddie lent down to help her up. Does he have to be nice to everyone?

"Her name was ... Well whatever you want it to be. Was she a princess? Sort of. Freddie continued.

"Sort of? How can she be sort of a Princess , she either was or she wasn't!" I pressured.

"well.. She didn't think so, but some people did." He replied.

"Who?" asked Mel.

"Her best friend. See to him she was a princess and no matter what anyone else said she would always be a princess to him." Said Freddie with a smile. Me and Mel gave each other a puzzled look.

"Go on..." I said.

"Well... The little girl was special. She was smart and funny. She went through loads of terrible things, and even though it was hard, because she was only 7 years old she still lived every day with the most amazing smile you could imagine. And..." Freddie was interrupted by the loud bang of the door down stairs.

I got up and opened the door of mine and Mel's room to see what was going on. I could see my mum screaming at someone. A man. He looked at me, and I instantly recognised him. I closed the door faster than lightning and ran to my bed with a horrified look on my face.

"Sam what's the matter!" Freddie concurringly questioned as he placed an arm on my shoulder.

Just then a tall, dark haired man with an evil look on his face stormed into my room.

He held a broken beer bottle in his hand.

He walked over to my bed, and angrily raised his arm, ready to hit me. I trembled with fear.

A worried look came across Freddie's face and as he went to hit me, Freddie ran in front. The back of his head was met with sharp chards of glass. He feel straight to the floor and I kneeled by his side. Crying.

"FREDDIE!...GET UP! ...PLEASE! GET UP!" I screamed. "I'm so sorry...

...

That was the last time I ever saw my dad. But I'm reminded everyday with the thought of what might have happed to me if Freddie hadn't done that. And with the wonder of why he'd want to do something like that for me...

 **What it's me and..**

 **peace to the pigeon lovers and Seddie followers! Good day to you!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Authors note: Hey, well... I have a great excuse for not updating...I really do! I...umm...well...kinda went on a Big time rush craze...I'm really sorry. But I was reading fanfics and it made me feel... sorry... so this was born. parts of it I kinda like others I thought were fairly weren't too good, but I've got some ideas and it should get better. and I don't just mean a flashback! ... anyway... BTW I deeply apologise for he over use of the ellipses in this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: Don't own the greatest show known to mankind. aka icarly!**

FREDDIE POV

So, me and Sam haven't spoken about the events of the funeral ever since that night 4 months ago. Life just seemed to go back to normal, well as normal as our life gets. Carly hasn't suspected a thing. I knew that Sam wasn't going to say anything to her, I know Sam and she properly just going to get over the night herself and pretend it never happened. And lets face it telling Carly wouldn't help her succeed with that.

But pretending it never happed doesn't make seeing Sam every day any less of a struggle. Its torture, just one look in those gorgeous crystal eyes makes me go crazy. Still I have to be patient, I've gone through literally everyway possible way I could try to gain Sam's love and after my studies I have come to the conclusion that if its meant to be it will happen by itself. And, even though it's difficult to tell myself that everyday when I look at her, I know that I'd only really want to be in a relationship with Sam if she felt the same way. For her own sake. I just want her to be happy.

Anyway... Back to reality, It was Sam's birthday party yesterday. It was a huge success! Well... Apart from the fact Carly invited Sam's stupid, idiot, horrible, stupid- (okay stay with it Freddie.) Crush. His names Pete Sam's totally crazy for him! I mean its like I don't even exist!- Still I just want her to be happy, right? ... Anyway, after she started acting really weird, like polite, I kinda hate it. Plus earlier I saw her emptying her locker, and she hasn't even given Gibby a wedgie yet today. Weird. Something must be up.

So, now I'm just sitting here in home room waiting for the girls, whilst doodling in my note pad little poems about you know who. Wow, this is really what my life has come to, geez...I must just really like my this blonde angle (I prefer that term rather than demon).

Oh here comes Carly...

"Hey...Where's Sam?" I question, hopefully not too suspiciously.

"Um...I think she went to the bathroom" She replies.

"k, so...what was she doing emptying her locker earlier?" I ask.

"Well... she says she wants to be girly, you know so Pete will like her. And to do so she's getting rid of all of her 'violent, boyish' things" says Carly. Wow, this took me by surprise. She...umm...must really like this guy. 'I'm so very happy for her.'- oh who am I kidding I can't take this I need to get Sam...before it's too late.

I got home later and ignoring my mother entered my bedroom. Laid on my bed and thought...

How can this be happening... SERIOUSLY! All we been through, SHE KISSED ME FOR GOODNEES SAKE!

And I mean why is she trying to make herself girly for this guy anyway, she's way too perfect for that. Why can't she see it?

I see it...

 **Yeah, sooo if you've managed to make it this far good on you! and if you actually read the authors notes umm... thanks a bunch!**

 **Peace to the pigeon lovers and Seddie followers! Good day to you!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Authors note: so the last time i tried to upload this it didn't go so well so here we go again. BTW i just re-read the first chapter and am deeply** **apologetic** **for the mistakes,but its hard because my laptop can't get word or spell check.**

 **Disclaimer: Never have owed the icarly!**

SAM POV

Okay wow, that went...umm better than expected. I did it i actually got Pete to ask me on a date. HOW? What would any guy see in me? Then again Pete isn't into me, he's into the thing Carly's made me. He doesn't like really like ME that way. Shouldn't i be more upset about that. But I'm not . Maybe it's because i like Pete so much (Yeah right.) Or maybe its because i really couldn't care less about Pete and I'm just using him to keep my mind of Freddie. Well even if that is true it wouldn't matter Freddie doesn't even like me the way i like him. Even if he thinks he did by now he's probably realized how i don't deserve him and how much better Carly is. UGHH Sam stop thinking about him! Just think of the alternative, you know dating Pete and having to pretend I'm something I'm not every time I'm with him. And umm... Feeling a aching pain in my stomach whenever Freddie's with me or says my name or is kissing another girl... And never being truly happy.

Wow now I'm crying, how does that boy do this to me! The thing is if i didn't care so much about Freddie and want him to be happy I'd probably have given into him that night and wouldn't be in this situation. But the ting is i do care, and i will take to my grave that no matter what happens I'll never deserve that boy. And I'd never give into his plea when he says he loves me. Well I'd try my very hardest...

There goes the rain, and I'm not even half way home. It's begging to wash the make up that Carly applied of my face, along with the tears that recently fell. I'm staring mournfully at the ground when i bump into someone. I look up to discover him, looking at me, looking straight into my eyes. Obviously still just realizing i was there. He says in worry-

"Oh, Sam sorry i didn't see you. Are you okay"

"umm... Of course, I'm fine." wow that's a big lie.

" No your not" geez mind reader. " What's wrong?" He asks as he pulls me to a near by bench.

"honestly Freddie, I'm okay.." I'm not going to lie, I'm hoping he doesn't believe me. He's so very cute when he worries.

"Sure..." He looks at my outfit." Geez look at you, you must be freezing! Here..." Hurriedly he takes of his jacket and wraps it around me, with no further concern for himself, or anyone else but me. I'm so distracted by the offer to refuse. It makes my insides flustered , and as he moves closer I don't think I've ever been as blown away and giddy as I am in this particular moment.

"Now, please just tell me why your upset. Because i know you Sam and I can tell you've been crying." He gives me a sincere, caring smile.

"I..I just, I'm confused about so many things in my life right now." I say finally letting him in.

"It's okay, look I'm always here if you want to talk about it. I know we don't get along so well, but you know i care about you and will always be here when you need me." he told me. I smiled.

"I just... I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing changing myself for Pete. He asked me on a date, and I don't know if i deserve to date him when I'm just pretending to be what he wants... But then again how am i ever suppose to get a boyfriend when I'm just being myself." I say. Freddie answered quickly-

"Easily, when you meet any boy with common sense! No guy is going to let you go without even trying unless he's an idiot! Your amazing Sam I don't now how you don't see it! Your funny, your clever, your pretty. Your just perfect and if Pete can't see that he's an idiot, and he will never be worthy of your love!"

"Freddie..."

"I mean it! You shouldn't let anyone change you. I couldn't stand to see that happen to you!" He pauses and we're both staring into each others eyes. The rain floods down but I'm to enticed by Freddie's words to care.

He moves closer, swallows and says...

"I Love you Sam, I love you and everything about you!" Without a second thought i find my lips crashing into his, it felt amazing.

I just couldn't help it...

 **Peace to pigeon lovers and Seddie day to you!**


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